Guest: Rubie (Part 1 of 2)
Michelle: Hey, everyone, welcome to the Pregnancy After 40 Podcast, this is your host, Michelle Johnson. Today, we are interviewing Rubie. Rubie is one of our more active members in the private Facebook group that we have if you are a member. And we are actually doing a two part episode for her, the first part we actually recorded when Rubie was at the end of her first trimester, beginning of her second trimester, she was about 14 weeks.
She talks about genetic testing at that time, she also talks about when she actually diagnosed with the flu, and then what she did to kind of get over that while she was pregnant. And, she also talks about having an incompetent cervix and her experience with that from her two previous pregnancies, and how she's dealing with it for the current pregnancy or the third pregnancy. And she also talks about gestational diabetes, she was diagnosed with Type II diabetes after her second pregnancy, when she got gestational diabetes with her son, and it actually never went away.
She talks about how she deals with gestational diabetes as well in this pregnancy. So, without further adieu, I'd like to welcome Rubie. Rubie, thanks for joining us today.
Rubie: Thank you for having me.
Michelle: Sure. Sure. So, Rubie, you are currently how old?
Rubie: I'm 43 years old now.
Michelle: Did you get pregnant at 43 as well?
Rubie: I did.
Michelle: Okay. All right. And do you have any other children?
Rubie: I do. I have an eight year old daughter and a seven year old son.
Michelle: So, with this pregnancy, were you trying to get pregnant with this pregnancy, or is this just kind of a surprise?
Rubie: So, we were trying, we started in 2018 trying, and we actually lost a baby in July of 2018. And from then, we weren't using anything, we weren't trying, but we weren't not trying, and nothing happened.
And at that point, I started missing periods, and so, I just figured I was starting to go with my changes, and I was fine with it. And, I was actually, have a wedding celebration coming up for us 54 days, and I was actually going to put my IUD back in, in November, but November ended up being a ridiculously busy month for me, and so, I was going to do it in December, and we got pregnant in November.
Michelle: Wow. Congratulations.
Rubie: Thank you.
Michelle: Congratulations. Just to back up a little bit, you said you miscarried back in 2018, how many weeks were you then?
Rubie: I was 12 weeks.
Michelle: Twelve weeks, okay. And I know...
Rubie: We went back to hear, sorry, we went back to hear the heartbeat and the baby just didn't have one anymore.
Michelle: Wow. So, I know that happens often. I miscarried early last year in 2019 around eight weeks or so. And I know, no one can tell you exactly what happened, but was anybody able to tell you what happened, or was it just, when you went in for 12 weeks the heartbeat wasn't there?
Rubie: Yeah. No, they weren't able to say anything.
Michelle: Was that the only miscarriage that you had?
Rubie: No. I had two with my ex-husband and one with my new husband.
Michelle: Were they all around the same time?
Rubie: With my ex-husband it was, we had one loss at eight weeks. And then, we had one loss I think at 10 or 11 weeks. And then, this was probably the latest one, the 12 weeks.
Michelle: When you got pregnant this time, did your OB do anything special, prescribe anything for you because of your previous miscarriages?
Rubie: He made sure that I was on a Vitamin D supplement, he prescribed just a prenatal that's very high in folic acid and very high in DHA. I just did the NIPT, but we refused all the other genetic testing.
He's been my OB and my GYN for probably about 20 years now. And he just knows me very, very well, and he' been with me through all the loses. And so, if my face doesn't look right he puts me in for a sonogram, which is so comforting.
Michelle: Wow.
Rubie: Yeah.
Michelle: So, you refused to do all the other genetic testing, what was your reasoning for doing that?
Rubie: So, with my son we got a false positive. He tested positive for trisomy 13 or 18 or Downs.
And we weren't going to terminate either way, and if it was God's will, then it was God's will, and that's what was going to happen. And, while we're watching his heartbeat on a 55 inch screen tv, they're talking to us about terminating the pregnancy. And even just the thought of getting it done again gives me so much anxiety that I refused it. And six weeks later they cleared him of everything, but until we saw him we weren't comfortable knowing that something could still be wrong with him.
And I really didn't enjoy my pregnancy with him, you know? And it was a very tough time for us anyway, because we were going through a hurricane here in New York, and we lost everything, he was born six weeks after.
Michelle: Wow.
Rubie: And so, I felt like because of that, I wasn't able to bond with him in while he was in utero, because I felt like something was going to happen to him when he came out.
It was going to be devastating as is, but I didn't want to get attached if that makes sense, knowing that something was going to happen to him.
Michelle: But he was born just perfectly healthy?
Rubie: He was perfect. He was perfect. He was born 10 lbs. 8 ounces, and full term, and he is more perfect than perfect. We couldn't even believe that, you know, 10 fingers, 10 toes, healthy.
Michelle: Is he the eight or the seven year old?
Rubie: He's my seven year old.
Michelle: And you have an eight year old daughter you told me?
Rubie: I have an eight year old daughter.
Michelle: Well, that definitely makes sense. I know I've seen a lot of chatter within the group itself about the testing and people and how they feel. And I've interviewed other people on the podcast who said the same thing, they've gotten false positives, or they've heard other people with false positives. So, it was definitely a personal choice, but I definitely understand in your situation.
You're currently 14 weeks, is that correct?
Rubie: Yes.
Michelle: Like I said, I started off saying you've had quite a journey in this first 14 weeks.
Rubie: Oh, yeah.
Michelle: You've been sick, and you've been exhausted, and all this. So, did you officially get diagnosed with the flu?
Rubie: I got diagnosed officially with flu A.
I actually took my son to a birthday party that previous Sunday, and the birthday boy got diagnosed with the flu that night.
Michelle: Oh, wow.
Rubie: And so, Monday was Martin Luther King Day, and Tuesday while I was coming home from work, I started throwing up on the train. It was awful. And then, my son came home from the babysitter with a fever of 102.3.
Michelle: Oh, no.
Rubie: I couldn't even move, I couldn't get out of bed, he couldn't get out of bed. It was awful. It was awful. It was probably the sickest that we have ever been.
Michelle: Wow. How many weeks pregnant were you at that time? Do you remember?
Rubie: It was three weeks ago, so 11 weeks.
Michelle: Wow. Prior to that did you take the flu shot?
Rubie: We don't do the flu shot, it's something that I don't believe in. And typically we do get the flu either every year or every other year, but I think this year, because I was pregnant, I think it was so much worse.
Michelle: Right. Right. I totally can relate to that. I'm usually pretty healthy overall, but this pregnancy I was sick for about two months for all of...
Rubie: Really?
Michelle: ...for November to December. I'd get something and I'd be sick for like two weeks, and I'd kind of get over it, then I'd catch something else. So, I know my immune system was definitely compromised.
Rubie: I never knew that your body suppresses the immune system when you get pregnant. It was something that I learned this pregnancy, I guess because my last two I really never got sick.
And this pregnancy I went to Urgent Care, I was just feeling awful, and that's when they diagnosed me with the flu. I said, "I don't understand." I said, "I don't get sick like this." And they said that it's the pregnancy, that your body suppresses the immune system, so that it doesn’t attack the fetus, and I never knew that.
Michelle: Yeah, I didn't know that either, I didn't know that was the reason. I knew your immune system was definitely compromised, I didn't know why or what purpose, or anything like that, but, yeah, that's interesting.
And I've never gotten the flu shot until this time around. I actually got it about two weeks before I got sick.
Rubie: Oh, right.
Michelle: During this pregnancy, it was kind of like, okay, I got the flu shot and then I got sick.
Rubie: Yeah.
Michelle: But, I had never taken it and the only reason I took was because, when I miscarried earlier last year, my son had gotten sick, he'd gotten a virus. And I was I guess, when I was about 7, 8 weeks pregnant and I caught it, because, I, again, I never usually get sick, but I caught it and I had a fever and all that, and I believe that's one of the reasons why I miscarried that time.
Rubie: Aww.
Michelle: When I found out what he had, I was like, okay. So, now he's actually, my son goes to a Mother's Morning Out twice a week at a church near us, I was like, he's going to be around other kids, so I'm kind of like freaking out about that. So, I took it, I don't know if it worked or not, but none of us in our family have taken it, my daughter has never taken it, my son never took it, my husband's never taken a shot. None of us have never taken it before, but I was like, this time just, I'm going to take it, and see what happens, and I still ended up sick for two months. Anyways, definitely a personal decision, so I understand.
So, there was a post in the group about miscarrying and a young lady was speaking of how long does it take to miscarry and all of that. And your response was that you had a D&C, or you miscarried on your own?
Rubie: I always have to have a D&C, my body for some reason, does not miscarry on its own.
Michelle: Really?
Rubie: Yeah.
Michelle: When is it? Is it after like a few weeks, or do you make that decision, or did you in the past made that decision early-on with you and your doctor?
Rubie: As soon as they find out that the baby has no heartbeat, what they'll do, he actually, because I was high risk with my daughter as well, he sent me to a Maternal Fetal Medical Center, where they can do an in-depth sonogram to make sure that there was no life function left.
Michelle: Okay.
Rubie: As soon as they confirmed it, then we scheduled the D&C.
Michelle: How has this pregnancy been different than your other pregnancies as far as symptoms, or are the symptoms still relatively the same?
Rubie: No, they're not at all, they're not at all. So, with my daughter I threw up probably for the first six months.
Michelle: Oh, wow.
Rubie: I didn't gain any weight for my first two trimesters, to the point where I had to get hospitalized.
Michelle: Really?
Rubie: Her pregnancy was very, very tough, at 20 weeks we almost lost her. I have an incompetent cervix, and at 20 weeks my body decided that it was giving birth. And so, I called my doctor and I said, "It's probably nothing, I said, "but I haven’t' felt the baby move for two days.
And he closed his practice and he had me come to the hospital, and I was 4 centimeters dilated and having contractions every minute and a half, and I was feeling nothing.
Michelle: Wow. Wow.
Rubie: Her pregnancy was very, very tough, but hers was the only one where I had, morning, afternoon, and evening sickness. My son's, I didn't throw up once, and I had energy and I wasn't exhausted, and this pregnancy, and I'm thinking that it's just because I'm older now, since my last pregnancy was eight years ago.
I am just so tired. Not anymore, I hit 13 weeks and I feel like a brand new person, but I would have to come home, I mean, and I work full-time, and I would come home and not go to sleep, but just have to lay down. My body was just done, you know? And I walk a lot for my job, so I probably work between 4 and 6 miles a day while I'm in the city working. And, it was something normal for me, I've done it for five years, and it's never really affected me until now.
But now at 14 weeks I have to say that I'm back to it and I'm good.
Michelle: Wow, that's good.
Rubie: Yeah.
Michelle: So, as far as the incompetent cervix, was there anything that was done then? Did you have a procedure done...?
Rubie: I did.
Michelle: ...or were you just...? Okay, so what did they do?
Rubie: They had to do an emergency rescue cerclage to save the pregnancy. And then, they had to put me in Inversion Therapy for three weeks, so that there was no weight and no pressure on my cervix, so the baby could stay in and grown, and my cervix could heal.
And then, I got sent home on full bedrest, and I, they took her five weeks early, because I got gestational diabetes with both of them. And my blood sugar was dropping so low that I didn't even know my name.
Michelle: Wow.
Rubie: I was in the hospital for I think four weeks before they took her. And they would come into my room, and I couldn't even tell them who I was. So, at 35 weeks they did an amino, they checked her lungs, they gave me the steroid shots, and at 35.2 they took her.
Michelle: Wow.
Rubie: Yeah.
Michelle: And was she healthy, she was born healthy as well.
Rubie: She was amazing, it was crazy. She was 5 weeks early, so technically a preemie, but 9 lbs.
Michelle: Oh, wow.
Rubie: And she spent half a day in NICU and was out. My son, who was full-term, who was perfectly healthy spent two weeks in NICU.
Michelle: Wow.
Rubie: I think because he was so big, his CRP levels were elevated, and so, it measures inflammation or infection, the CRP level, and they thought it was cardiac. They thought maybe he had a broken clavicle, because he was so big, and I'm fairly small. I'm narrow and I'm small, and I give birth to ginormous babies.
Michelle: Yeah.
Rubie: And so, at that point they were giving him oxygen, and his respiration rates were being affected, and no one understood what was going on, because he was born fine. So, he would have gone to NICU anyway, but just because I had gestational diabetes. But, he just ended up there so much longer than we expected him to be. He was born on 12/12/12, and he came home on Christmas Eve.
Michelle: Oh, wow. So, you had gestational diabetes with both of them, but with your son you said... did he have gestational diabetes as well, or was he diagnosed with having diabetes?
Rubie: No.
Michelle: Or was it just you?
Rubie: No, just me.
Michelle: Okay.
The reason I'm asking is because they've said I have gestational diabetes, although my numbers have been really well under control and I'm not on medication, but I've not heard that because you have gestational diabetes that the baby goes into the NICU. This is the first time that I've heard that. Now, they told me they would test him, the baby, once he's born, but I didn't know that was thing. So, it's definitely something for me to ask as well.
Rubie: Here it's a thing, they take the baby right into NICU just to regulate their blood sugar.
Michelle:. Okay. All right.
Rubie: If it needs to be regulated, I guess.
Michelle: Right. Okay. Well, it's definitely a question that I, me, personally I have to ask, and I'm sure other women will ask that as well. So, okay, earlier you mentioned that you had to get the emergency cerclage and you had Inversion Therapy, I've not heard that term before, the inversion therapy.
Rubie: Yeah.
Michelle: What exactly is that?
Rubie: They lay you on a bed where it's angled, so that your feet are basically a little bit elevated and you're lying flat, because they're trying to keep pressure off of your cervix.
Mine was 4 centimeters dilated when they did this emergency surgery, and so, he needed to make sure that my cervix could heal. And that, if I stood up, if I walked and when gravity took over, that nothing would happen to my cervix or the baby.
Michelle: So, did you, for your daughter and your son, did you deliver C-section or vaginally for them?
Rubie: I had C-sections for both of them. When I was 27 I was diagnosed with cervical cancer and they took part of my cervix, and that's why I have an incompetent cervix. So, with my son, when we got pregnant again, I voluntarily had a cerclage, because now that we knew that I had this issue, hopefully, the voluntary cerclage would nip the issue in the bud, and it absolutely did.
So, for him it was a healthy pregnancy up until the end of October. And, I went to my doctor, and I said, "For lack of a better word," he's like, "Yes?" I said, "I feel like my vagina's broken. I couldn't get into and out of my car, I was just so uncomfortable. And he said, "Oh." He said, "It might be," I said, "I don't understand what that means." And he said, "You may have broken your pubic bone because the baby is so heavy," and that's exactly what it was.
Michelle: Oh, my goodness. Really?
Rubie: All these things that I had no idea even like could happen, did.
Michelle: Right. Oh, my gosh. There's just so many things that you just don't even know about, that's crazy.
Rubie: I know.
Michelle: Wow. I was going to ask you something.
Rubie: Sorry.
Michelle: [inaudible] No, it's okay. Oh, And so, is the plan to get a cerclage with this pregnancy?
Rubie: Yes, next week. Next week.
Michelle: Okay.
Rubie: At 15 weeks we're going to schedule it. It's an outpatient procedure. You go in, you get it done, they monitor to make sure you're not contracting too much.
And then, I'll be sent home, and maybe a day or two of downtime, and then that's it.
Michelle: Okay. And so, I know you've had it done before, but can you just explain a little bit the process for other women who have to get it done?
Rubie: Sure:
Michelle: Exactly how long it takes, and the pain, if there's any?
Rubie: So, you go in the day before for presurgical testing, it's not technically surgery, but it's considered a procedure. So, you have to go in for blood work and such the day before. And then, you go in the day of, they hook you up to an IV for fluid. They bring you into the OR, they knock you out, and you wake up probably about an hour, an hour and a half later in Recovery where you're hooked up to a machine that measures contractions.
And once your uterus is not angry anymore, which is actually what they call it, it's so funny, they call it an angry uterus because you're having contractions. And once that's done they make sure that you're able to stand and that you're able to walk, and that you have someone to take you home, and then they send you home. Sometimes they send you home with a couple of days of antibiotics just to make sure there's no infection. I didn't with my son, but I did with my daughter, I think probably because it was an emergency, but, yeah, I never had any issues with it.
And then, come time for delivery, what they'll do is once they are getting you prepped for the C-section, then they will cut the stiches out of the cervix as well. The important thing with a cerclage is that you can't really go into labor, because it will pop the stiches.
Michelle: Oh, okay..
Rubie: So, you can't start having contractions, because everything starts contracting and your cervix starts contracting. And if that happens, then it will tear your cervix.
Michelle: I'm really paranoid, my thing about pregnancy is actually giving birth, because I hate pain. But, so, is the process of removing the stiches from the cerclage, is that painful? Do you feel it, or are you already in the mode?
Rubie: No, I'm already, I was, you're already numb, you know?
Michelle: Okay.
Rubie: You're already numb from the C-section.
Michelle: Okay. Okay. Got you.
I'm going to go back a little bit, I know we were talking about the flu earlier today, were you given anything for the flu, any medication to make you better?
Rubie: So, they gave me Tamiflu, which I don't take. I took it, so on Tuesday on the train on the way home, I started throwing up. Between Tuesday at six and Wednesday at noon, when I actually got to Urgent Care, I had thrown up 19 times. I wasn't even holding down ice chips. And so, when I went to Urgent Care they wrote me a prescription for Tamiflu, and they gave me Zofran.
And, the Zofran finally got my stomach settled, so it was such a relief to not throw up anymore. And so, I took the first dose of Tamiflu and it made me start throwing up again. And so, I called my doctor and I said, "Look," I'm like, "Realistically," I said, "Tamiflu is only going to decrease this by a day or so." I said, "Do I really need to take it?" And he said, "Not if you're not feeling well on it." He said, "Just make sure you're hydrated and make sure your fever stays below 101, and just Tylenol every few hours.
And, if it gets too hot, take a tepid bath, and he said, "Handle it that way." He said, "But, take Vitamin C and make sure that you're just taking in fluids now that you can finally drink and hold things down."
Michelle: So, how far along were you when you got your appetite back overall? Because I know that was an issue for you, you couldn't keep anything down, and then one day you ordered Chinese, and...
Rubie: Yeah.
Michelle: ...and you thought you were going to have Chinese, but you didn't, so…
Rubie: No. The smell just really bothered me. So, probably I want to say...
Rubie: It was like 12 ½ , 13 weeks when I actually started eating again. I was eating little bits and here and there, but I wasn't eating a full meal, I was literally just eating because I knew I had to. But, I really didn't, you know, I didn't have an appetite, I wasn't hungry for anything, until probably last week. My husband has never been so happy to see me eat.
Michelle: That's funny. Yeah, well, I'm glad you're able to eat as well.
Rubie: Yeah, thanks.
Michelle: That can really just suck, really and truly.
Rubie: It was awful. Believe it or not, the drinking, not being able to drink anything was so, I was so parched, I felt so dehydrated. And all I wanted to do was just drink something and nothing was staying down, nothing.
Michelle: Wow. Wow. Well, I know, I've had someone on the podcast before who just had really bad nausea throughout the pregnancy, for probably a good six months, and, but she was given something. So, were you given anything for the nausea, or was it just kind of, "You're still in your first trimester, it'll go away, if it doesn't, then we'll give you something?"
Rubie: They gave me Zofran. The prescribed Zofran and they gave me Zofran at the Urgent Care Center.
Michelle: Okay. Okay. All right. So, this time around, you got a Doppler to see the baby's heartbeat.
Rubie: I did.
Michelle: How did you choose your Doppler and how did you get it? And how often do you use it now?
Rubie: So, I didn't really choose my Doppler, my ex-husband's cousin actually sent it to me. She just had a baby, so her baby is now I think 6 or 7 months old.
And she said, she is done having children, and she's going to send it to me just because it's such a nice peace of mind to have it, and to be able to listen to the heartbeat. And I said, "That's amazing," so, she said, just order the gel from wherever, Amazon." She's like, "You'll probably get it tomorrow," she said. And she told me what to do and how to use it, and that's what I've been doing. And I was so excited, because when I first got it, I think I was about 11 weeks along, just about 11 weeks along.
And she said, she's like, "Don't freak out if you don't hear anything at first." She's like, "No," she's like, "sometimes it just takes a while." I said, "Okay." And so, I was thrilled, I tried it and I heard a heartbeat, and I was so excited, and I go to my doctor's office, and I said, "Oh, you know, I'm like, my ex-husband's cousin sent me this Doppler and I've been listening the baby's heartbeat." And so, he's using his Doppler now and I'm pointing on my stomach to where I hear the baby, and it's more off to the side.
And he said, "Oh," he said, "The baby's there," he said, "On your hip bone, not in your uterus." And I said, "What are you saying?" And he said, that's probably your heartbeat, because it's probably your aorta that has split and that's what you're getting. He said, "The baby's heartbeat is much faster than yours." And I said, "It sounded fast," and so, he showed me at that point exactly where I needed to be and what I needed to do. And finally, I was able to hear the baby's heartbeat. I said, "You know what," I said, "for the past three weeks," I said, "it has made me feel better."
Michelle: Right.
Rubie: I said, "So, whether it was mine or whether it was the baby's, we're all good." He's like, Okay."
Michelle: I totally understand, that's so funny.
Rubie: It was hysterical.
Michelle: Wow. Wow. Yeah, so, I don't know, maybe you're, you were probably the same way like I am, I've just been on total paranoia with this pregnancy because of the previous miscarriage.
Rubie: Right.
Michelle: So, do you, you've experienced miscarriages as well, do you feel the same kind of anxiety...
Rubie: Yes.
Michelle: ...as well? Okay. Did you experience the same thing with your son?
Rubie: No.
Michelle: Or, actually, I guess the other pregnancies as well, just the anxiety of, can I miscarriage? Will I miscarriage?
Rubie: You know, I didn’t. So, we got pregnant with my daughter, it took us a while to get pregnant with her. And I had to go on Metformin to ovulate, I wasn't ovulating, which I had no idea, because I was getting a period every month. And, so literally three months on Metformin, I ovulated for the first time, and I got pregnant, the first time I ovulated. And, I don't know why, with her I was never afraid of losing it.
I'm not very religious and we had to gown to temple, I'm Hindu, and I'd gone to temple, and I never, ever, ever pray for myself, I always pray for others. And I was in temple, and I said, "Look," I'm like, "I don't ever ask for anything," I said, "All I want is to get pregnant. I want a healthy pregnancy; I want to bring a healthy baby into this world." And I don't know what at that moment, I just, I felt somebody was listening. And my eyes welled up and I got super emotional. And my dad was there with me, and he said, "What's the matter?" And I said, "I said a prayer, hoping that someone hears me, and I can actually have a baby, you know?"
I said, "I'm 34 years old now," I said, "I never really wanted, you know, for years I went through not wanting children." And I said, "I really, really want this." And literally that month, we got pregnant.
Michelle: Wow.
Rubie: And for some reason I was not afraid of losing her. I don't know why; I was never afraid that I was going to miscarry her. And then, at 20 weeks when we had all this happen, even at that point, I knew that I wasn't going to lose her.
Michelle: Wow.
Rubie: I was just, even when my doctor came in and said, "Look, you're 4 centimeters dilated and you're contracting every minute and a half," I was very calm." And I said, "What do we need to do?" And he said, "How are you so calm?" And I said, "Because, everything's going to be fine, just tell me what we need to do." And, he literally brought me into surgery at midnight, and here we are, and now she's eight.
Michelle: Wow. Amazing.
Rubie: And with my son also, we got the go-ahead to start trying when she was 7 months old, we got pregnant, I want to tell you, probably the first time we tried. And up until they started talking about the trisomy, I wasn't nervous to lose him either.
Michelle: And then, after that, maybe not the next pregnancy, which was the third one, but after that, I would assume that maybe there was a little bit more concern or were you still okay, after...?
Rubie: Well, so the last pregnancy was, the one that we lost was in July of 2018. And, I honestly didn't feel like I was pregnant. I felt, I was tired, I was a little agitated, but I didn't feel pregnant. It sounds very weird, but I know that there's women that don't feel pregnancy symptoms, but I've always felt pregnancy symptoms.
I knew when I was pregnant both times. And maybe this time I was in denial about it, just because we had had the loss. But, I don't know, I felt maybe like my hormone levels weren't high enough. I just didn't feel pregnant with the last one, but I did feel it with this one.
Michelle: Well, I definitely, we all wish you the best of luck with this pregnancy.
Rubie: Thanks.
Michelle: And I want to ask another question.
Rubie: Sure.
Michelle: The gestational diabetes, since you had that with the previous two children, have you already done the testing, I guess the glucose testing, for this pregnancy?
Rubie: No, because after my son, my diabetes never went away, so now I’m Type II diabetic.
Michelle: Oh, wow. Okay. So, okay. So, previous to your pregnancies you didn't have diabetes.
Rubie: I didn't.
Michelle: Were you at risk? Did you have the increased risk factors?
Rubie: I do. I have a huge family history of it.
Michelle Johnson. Okay. All right.
Rubie: And my father has it, my mother's pre-diabetic, and literally every uncle, my grandfather, everybody has it in my family.
Michelle: Wow. So, what are you on, or what were you on prior to getting pregnant this time? Are you on insulin or Metformin?
Rubie: No, I just take Metformin. It's so well controlled that I'm good with just the Metformin. And even now for this pregnancy, I'm still on Metformin for 20 weeks, and then they're going to change my medication.
Michelle: Okay. Is there a reason they're going to change the medication?
Rubie: Apparently, you're only supposed to be on Metformin until 20 weeks, because they haven't done enough research on it, on pregnant women.
But the way that my doctor explained it to me was, they use Metformin to get pregnant. He said, so, he really doesn't believe that it has harmful effects on a baby. He said, but, he said as my physician, he can't ethically tell me that it's fine to take when they haven't done research on it. And they have done research on other medications. He said, "So," he said, "Essentially, if you refuse to give it up," he said, "it would be up to you," he said, "but I can’t' tell you that that's okay." I said, "Okay."
So, I’m going to follow his lead, obviously, this is what he does for a living and he's good at it.
Michelle: What's your dosage that you're taking right now with the Metformin?
Rubie: I was taking, before I got pregnant, 2,000 milligrams a day. I was taking 1,000 milligrams in the morning, and then 1,000 milligrams in the evening. Now I cut my pills in half to 500 milligrams each, and I take about 1,000 milligrams.
Michelle: Okay. When 20 weeks comes, are you going on insulin or are you going on something else?
Michelle: This is a conversation that we haven't had yet, but I refused insulin with both of my other children, and I think that I'm going to refuse it now.
My numbers are very, very good. My A1C is 5.6, so I'm very well managed, so even if it's just a small dose of oral medication, I feel like I can probably make do with that.
Michelle: Now, are you testing every day? Do you have to test like four times a day, or a daily number?
Rubie: I have something called a Freestyle Libre, have you heard of this?
Michelle: I have not.
Rubie: What it is, and I've had it for two years now, it's a needle, it's a system, it's a sensor that goes into you and it stays in you for two weeks.
And you there's an app and you scan it, and you can scan it 35 times a day if you want, which is basically what I do. So, I'll eat something and then a half hour later scan it, just to see how my body's responding to it. And it's amazing how different my numbers have been since I've been pregnant. Things just break down faster, they break down easier, I guess my metabolism has increased because of the baby. But, yeah, if I go back to my log book to pre-pregnancy and what I actually ate, and how my numbers were affected, they are so much lower now.
Michelle: And what is that called again, that you have?
Rubie: It's called a Freestyle Libre.
Michelle: A Freestyle.
Rubie: The only thing is that I don't know if they're giving it to pregnant woman, only because doctor's want them to take the finger test, the finger prick, just because... It took them a long time to give me this also. They want to make sure that you're testing properly before they give this to you.
They want to make sure that you're testing when you're supposed to, they make sure that your numbers are good. Personally, I think it's life changing. My last job I used to travel internationally often for work. And I wouldn't test, because I was in meetings in Europe, and how can I just whip out a kit and prick myself in front of people, it just wasn't doable. And, so I found that I wasn't doing it, and my endocrinologist said, they finally brought it to the U.S., it's been in Europe for years.
And he said, "You are the best candidate for it with all your travel." And it has literally been life-changing, my A1c, I mean, not that it was high, but it was 6.0, and since having this, I've been consistently at 5.6.
Michelle: That's good. Yeah, I understand with the testings, I’m supposed to test four times a day. I usually get in at least two, sometimes three, three is a good day for me. But, yeah, as far as four, it doesn't happen that often.
Like this weekend and last week, by trade I'm an attorney, so I had a two day conference, and it was like, yeah, you're there all day, and just funny about, okay, taking out your glucose little testing thing, and poking and all of that. I just thought that at some point, when my numbers kind of look good the doctor is going to take me off of it, and just say maybe like, twice a day, or a couple times a week, no, that hasn't happened. And, I don't... it's like they will now, now that I only have like two weeks left.
Yeah, because I remember asking initially, isn't there...? Because both of my parents are actually diabetic.
Rubie: Okay.
Michelle: I was like, "Isn't there something that I can just, where they can just like, not even prick me, but they can somehow tell what my sugar is or scan something?
Rubie: Yeah, there is.
Michelle: And my specialist was telling me, "Well, it's still kind of new, and so, they don't know how accurate it is, so, we can't give it to you."
Rubie: What they had me do is, they had me put it in, and when I first got it, it was a 24 hour activation period.
You would prick yourself, and then the next day you'd be able to use it. So, since then they've upgraded it, so originally when I got it, it was every 10 days you had to change it, and now, it's every two weeks you have to change it. But, while in my doctor's office, once it was activated, he pricked me, he checked my blood sugar and then we scanned my Freestyle, and it was only 6 points off. So, realistically, it really was not so much.
Michelle: Well, I can even tell other people this, sometimes I'll test my sugar, my biggest issue, I can control it with food when I'm eating throughout the day. It was my fasting levels that were kind of weird and they were a little bit elevated, which I couldn't figure out, because I'm like, I haven't eaten.
But, I could test, and it would be 106 or something like that, which is a little elevated.
Rubie: Yeah, it's not bad though.
Michelle: And then, I would just turn around like, I'm like, you know what, I'm like, that's kind of high. And so, I'll retest again on another finger and then it would be like 92. And so, I'm kind of like, well, what is that?
Rubie: That's interesting.
Michelle: It is, and I've done it, it's happened a lot more within the last couple of weeks. I'll notice that it'll be a little bit high, I'm like, yeah, this doesn't really makes sense based off of what I ate. And I'll prick another finger, and it'll be 10 to 15 points different, which is, I'm like, well, how accurate are these things?
Should I go with the high number or the lower number? Obviously I'm going with the lower number, because...
Rubie: But I wonder if it's your meter?
Michelle: ... It could be, I guess? Yeah, I got it this go-around, I've never used it before, but, yeah.
Rubie: But you know what, if they're not calibrated properly this can happen also. My father had that issue, he would check it, and then he would go back 15 minutes later, and it would be a ridiculous number that was nothing like, you know, he had not eaten anything. And 15 minutes later it's like 15, 20 points lower or higher, and he's like, "It doesn't make sense."
And so, he ended up getting a new meter.
Michelle: Okay. Yeah, I might bring it up to their attention tomorrow when I go to my appointment. But, yeah, it's just kind of weird, they should get those different... because there's actually a difference from it being elevated to being okay.
Rubie: Right. Right.
Michelle: And so, this whole thing is just kind of nerve-wracking, and it's, you know...
Rubie: It really is, it really is.
Michelle: ...we both have experienced.
So, I know again you're 14 weeks and we would love to have you on again. You guys are giving a plethora of information just about different things, things that I haven't heard of, or haven't even experienced. So, thank you for sharing that.
Rubie: Absolutely.
Michelle: Again, we definitely want to connect with you after the baby is born.
Rubie: Sure.
Michelle: Are you going to find out the sex of the baby?
Rubie: We are. This is the first time that I have found out the sex of my baby. So, we'll find out in about two weeks. We'll find out in about two weeks.
Michelle: Okay.
Rubie: We'll find out in about two weeks, we just sent out the, well, not just, we sent in the paperwork week for the NIPT, and with that blood work they'll be able to tell us the sex of the baby.
The results should be back in, if not by the end of this week, definitely by the end of next week.
Michelle: Okay. Now, does your current husband, does he have any children?
Rubie: He doesn't. He's seven years younger than me, this is his first marriage, and this is his first child.
Michelle: I know at the end of the day we're hoping for a happy, healthy baby, but do you have your preference as far as a boy or a girl?
Rubie: He doesn't have a preference, I do, but he does not.
Michelle: What is your preference?
Rubie: I want a boy.
Michelle: You do?
Rubie: I do. My little boy, and my daughter is amazing, but I want her to be the only girl.
Michelle: Really?
Rubie: She enjoys being the only girl, even from his side of the family, she's the only girl in their whole family.
The last girl that was born was my husband's sister 48 years ago.
Michelle: Oh, my goodness. Wow.
Rubie: She loves it. His mother loves having a girl, she loves being the only girl most of the time, except for when it's all boys playing. But, yeah, I think that I would love for her to be the only girl. And my boy, I don't know, I just have such a bond with him. He is, and I'm sure so many moms feel this way about their sons, he is just the sweetest, sweetest little boy and he is a mama's boy. He loves his mother.
And he doesn't have attitude, and he doesn't have sass, and he's just easy-peasy, and at 43 I feel like I need another easy-peasy.
Michelle: Okay, so let me tell you about my little history here. So, I have a 17 year old daughter, who I had at 25. And then, so, when my son was born she was 16, she turned 16 like two days before that. And so, everyone would ask me with my son, "What do you want?" And I was like, "Well, I have a teenage daughter, what do you think I want?" I'm in the midst of whole attitude...
Rubie: Oh, yeah.
Michelle: ...and, you know, just being a teenage girl.
And then, plus it's my husband's first child as well. So, you know, I had a boy, but this pregnancy the question again was, okay, do you want a girl or a boy? Now, my husband wanted a girl, my daughter wanted a girl. But, her thing, and it was interesting like when she said it, her thing was she did not want to be the only girl grandchild. So, she's got...
Rubie: Wow.
Michelle: I have a brother, and he has two sons, and then, I have her and I have the boy, and then another boy who I'm having in a couple weeks.
That was her thing was she didn't want to be the only girl.
Rubie: Wow.
Michelle: And I was like, that's just very interesting how, you know? And I'm like, well, no, I think that's really special that you're the only girl and you're different. And she was like, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. I don't want to be the only girl." So, it's like what I say has not helped, but maybe I can play and just let her listen to this part of the podcast, and she'll be like, "Okay." She can realize how special it is to be the only girl.
Rubie: It is. It is.
Michelle: That's what I think, and my thing with wanting another boy, I just, she hated, my daughter hated being an only child, I have a bigger gap, she just absolutely hated it. And so, that's why we decided to have this second baby here, this will be our last one.
Rubie: Aww. Right.
Michelle: But I wanted them to have a sibling, because, I'm 43, my husband will be 50 by the time this baby is born. And, I tell people, it takes him about a good 7 to 10 steps when he gets out of bed before he can walk straight again. And so, we don't have that same kind of energy. And he still goes to the gym, he still plays basketball, he's healthy for his age, but, yet in still, we are still a little bit older.
Rubie: Listen, my husband is 36, it takes him 7 to 10 steps to start working walking straight too.
Michelle: Oh, okay.
Rubie: He's in construction and his back is wrecked, I feel you.
Michelle: Okay.
Rubie: I feel you.
Michelle: Yes. But, yeah, I just wanted him to have a playmate, but he's going to get a playmate and then we'll be done. But, Rubie, it was so good talking to you.
Rubie: It was so good talking to you.
Michelle: Oh, another question, so I think you joined the group about three weeks ago, how's your experience been in the Facebook group?
Rubie: It's been good. It's been good. There was a post the other day about I think CBD and marijuana during pregnancy.
I didn't really so much agree with what was being posted, but, I mean, look it was a civil conversation, and it's nice to see that even when there's difference in opinions, no one gets catty or gross, or, you know, it was just nice.
It was nice that you can have differing opinions and not have issues, which is not what you see in a lot of these groups, you know?
Michelle: Well, I can say this, so as Administrator, I don't go through every post, I just can't go through everything that's there, but, you know.
Rubie: No, how can you? You have a life, and you have children.
Michelle: Right.
Rubie: And a job, that's not easy.
Michelle: But, I mean I'd like the people, if you do feel like it's somewhat offensive, definitely report, and I kind of look at things to see if it's appropriate. And I've had to, I've actually had to kick and block some members out, because things have gotten just a little too far, not often. But, yeah, I mean, definitely and for anyone who's listening if there's something offensive that's being said or posted, definitely report it and we'll look it over and see if it violate any of the rules or anything like that. Because you definitely want to have a supportive group, because there's just an array of women in the group.
Rubie: Absolutely.
Michelle: You know, so, from all over the world.
Rubie: It's different personalities, right.
Michelle: Yeah.
Rubie: Right.
Michelle: I'm actually going to go look for that one now, because I haven't seen that one, I'm just going to look it over, and just see how that conversation went. But, thanks again...
Rubie: My pleasure.
Michelle: ...you have a wonderful day and a wonderful pregnancy, and we will connect with you after the baby's born.
Rubie: You got it. And you as well, have a great day.
Michelle: Thanks, you too. Bye-bye.
Rubie: Bye.